What is Grump City? Is it a state of being, a lifestyle (brand), a mythical land of Mourinhos, asoccer, or simply the greatest ever boat safety instructional video ever compiled? To understand requires braving the calm waters of the Japanese Inland Sea from Teshima to Uno, but only after witnessing a rarest of sights: a Japanese person raising their voice in argument to defend seafaring luggage policies. In lieu of thousands of miles of travel, read on.

Grump City is really what you make of it, and we've made a website, and another website, and an expanded universe because that seems to be the it thing these days.

Also let's be honest that ferry is a dead ringer for pitchside Mourinho after his "Park the Bus" tactics failed for the umpteenth time (see below).

Welcome, grumpy brethren, sistren, and thethren.